My Heart Exploded: Watching Cherry Grow Up Too Fast (Seriously, Where Does The Time Go?)

Okay, you guys. I was just scrolling through my phone, like ya do, and I stumbled upon this picture of Cherry when she was just a tiny little nugget. And I swear to you, my heart literally exploded into a million pieces. Like, full-on emotional meltdown over here. It hit me so hard, you guys. So. Freakin. Hard. 🥹

She was this little just yesterday, I swear. And now? She’s running around, trying to keep up with Stella and Ozzy, saying little words, and just being this whole tiny human with a personality that’s already bigger than mine, hahah. It’s wild, isn’t it? How one minute you’re holding this impossibly small, squishy baby, and the next they’re practically asking for the car keys. Okay, maybe not car keys yet, but you know what I mean! It just feels like time is playing some kind of cruel joke on us parents, just speeding up when we want it to slow down.

The Blurry Haze of Newborn Days

I remember those newborn days with Cherry like they were yesterday, but also like they were a lifetime ago. It’s such a weird paradox, right? The exhaustion was real, you guys. Like, a level of tired I didn’t even know existed until I had three girls. But even through the sleepless nights, the endless diaper changes, and the constant cluster feeding, there were these tiny, perfect moments that I clung to. Her little hand wrapped around my finger. That sweet, milky baby smell. The way she’d fall asleep on my chest, and I’d just lay there, scared to move, just soaking it all in. I didn’t want to miss a single breath.

And now, looking back at that picture, it’s like a punch to the gut in the best possible way. It reminds me of how precious those moments were, and how quickly they’re gone. I feel like I blinked, and my baby is not a baby anymore. She’s a toddler. A tiny, fierce, independent little human. And while I absolutely adore watching her grow and discover the world, there’s this part of me that just aches for those days when she was so completely dependent on me. Is that selfish? Idc, it’s how I feel. :,)

Feeling All The Feels (And That’s Okay)

Tanner always tells me I’m too emotional, but honestly, how can you NOT be emotional when you’re watching your kids grow up? It’s like a constant rollercoaster of joy, pride, nostalgia, and a little bit of sadness that things are changing. And you know what? I’ve learned that it’s totally okay to feel all of it. We’re allowed to mourn the loss of one stage while celebrating the beginning of another.

I think sometimes, especially with social media, there’s this pressure to always be positive and always be celebrating the next milestone. And yes, I love celebrating all of Cherry’s new tricks and words! But it’s also okay to sit with that feeling of, “Wow, she’s not my tiny baby anymore,” and let yourself feel a little wistful. It doesn’t mean you’re not grateful for the present, it just means your heart is big enough to hold all those different emotions at once. That’s what motherhood is, isn’t it? A big, messy, beautiful jumble of feelings.

How Do We Even Capture It All?

This feeling always makes me want to just freeze time, but since I can’t do that (curse my freakin’ lack of superpowers, hahah), I try to find ways to capture these moments. And I’m not just talking about perfectly curated Instagram posts, although I love those too! I mean, really truly capture the essence of it all.

• Photos and Videos: Obvs. But not just the posed ones. The candid, messy, everyday ones. The ones where Cherry has food all over her face, or Stella is making a ridiculous face, or Ozzy is doing something totally unexpected. Those are the real treasures. I’m so glad I have a million videos of them babbling and doing silly dances. I know I’ll look back at those when they’re teenagers and probably cry all over again.
• Journaling (ish): Okay, so I’m not, like, a dedicated journaler, bc who has the time, right? But sometimes I’ll just jot down a quick note in my phone about something funny one of the girls said, or a sweet moment I don’t want to forget. Or I’ll just tell Tanner all about it later, and he’ll pretend to listen, hahah. But it helps me process it and remember.
• Being Present: This is probably the hardest one for me, tbh. With work, and the house, and three kids, my brain is always going a million miles an hour. But I try really hard to put my phone down, look them in the eyes, and just be there. Really listen to what they’re saying, watch them play, hug them tight. Those are the moments that truly get etched into your heart, more than any photo ever could.

Embracing the Next Chapter (Even If It’s Bittersweet)

So, yeah, seeing that picture of baby Cherry hit me hard. It made me a little sad for those fleeting newborn days, but it also filled my heart with so much gratitude for the amazing little person she’s becoming. Every stage brings new challenges, but also new joys. Watching her develop her own personality, seeing her interact with Stella and Ozzy, hearing her little voice say “Mama” – those are the things that make my heart swell.

I’m trying my best to soak up every single moment, even the chaotic ones. Because I know, in a blink, she’ll be off to kindergarten, then middle school, then who knows what. And I’ll be looking back at pictures of her as a toddler, thinking, “She was this little just yesterday, I swear.” It’s just the nature of parenthood, I guess. A beautiful, messy, fast-forward kind of love story. And I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. :,)

To all you mamas out there feeling the same way – you’re not alone. We’re all in this wild ride together. Let’s just keep loving our babies, big or small, and trying our best to cherish every single second. Because they really do grow up too fast. Like, freakin’ lightning fast.

What are your favorite ways to remember your kids’ baby days? Tell me in the comments, I’d love to hear!