Unfreezing My Brain: How I'm Learning to Just Pick Something (Even When It's Hard)

Okay, so I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, and I realized something kinda big about myself: I'm a freezer. Like, when it comes to making decisions, big or small, my brain just totally locks up. It's something I've always struggled with, and honestly, I h8 that about myself hahah. I mean, who wants to be the person who can't even pick what to have for dinner without a full-blown internal crisis, right? But seriously, it's a real thing, and I know I'm not the only one out there who feels this way. So I wanted to share a little bit about what I've been learning and how I'm trying to unfreeze my brain, one tiny decision at a time. Maybe it'll help someone else out there who's also stuck in decision-making limbo. :)

The Realization: Oh My Gosh, I'm a Freezer

It started with little things, like trying to pick out an outfit for the day. I'd stand in front of my closet for what felt like an hour, pulling things out, putting them back, feeling overwhelmed by the options. Then it moved to bigger things, like what color to paint Stella's room (which, btw, was a whole saga). And then, of course, the truly monumental decisions, like what kind of car to get, or even what to name baby Cherry (thank goodness Tanner was there to help narrow it down, bc my brain was just *poof* gone). I'd get so caught up in wanting to make the *perfect* choice, the *best* choice, that I'd end up making no choice at all. And that, my friends, is the definition of being a freezer. My brain just hits pause, and I'm stuck. It's like I'm afraid of making the wrong move, so I just... don't move at all. And that's not living, ya know? That's just being stuck.

Why Do We Freeze? My Theories (and What I'm Learning)

I've been thinking a lot about *why* I do this. And I think for me, a big part of it is the fear of regret. Like, what if I pick this, and then later I see something better? Or what if I make this decision, and it turns out to be a mistake? I think it also comes from wanting to please everyone, or at least not disappoint anyone. Which, let's be real, is impossible. Another thing is just pure overwhelm. When there are too many options, my brain just shuts down. It's like a computer trying to run too many programs at once – it just crashes. And in our world today, there are SO many options for literally everything. It's a lot! But I'm learning that sometimes, the best decision is just *a* decision. Not necessarily the perfect one, but one that moves you forward. Because being stuck is way worse than making a choice that might not be 100% ideal. You can always adjust later, right?

My (Still Learning) Strategies for Unfreezing

So, what am I doing about it? Well, it's a work in progress, but I've picked up a few little tricks that are helping me slowly but surely unfreeze my brain. And when I say 'tricks,' I mean more like 'things I'm trying really hard to remember to do.' Hahah.

• The 5-Second Rule (or something like it): For small decisions, I'm trying to just pick the first thing that feels good. Like, if I'm trying to decide what snack to grab, I just grab the one I thought of first. No overthinking. It's surprisingly freeing!
• Embracing 'Good Enough': This one is hard for me, bc I always want the best for my girls, for Tanner, for our home. But I'm learning that 'good enough' is often truly good enough. Not everything has to be Pinterest-perfect or the absolute top-tier choice. A decision that gets the job done and makes us happy is perfectly fine.
• Asking for a Second Opinion (but not too many!): Tanner is my rock for this. If I'm really stuck, I'll go to him and say, 'Okay, help me pick between A and B.' He's usually pretty decisive, which is a good balance for my indecisiveness. But I try to limit it to just one or two trusted people, bc too many opinions just makes me freeze up again!
• Setting Time Limits: This is a new one I'm trying. For bigger decisions, I'll tell myself, 'Okay, I have 30 minutes to research this, and then I have to make a choice.' It forces me to actually decide instead of just endlessly scrolling and comparing.
• Remembering My 'Why': Sometimes, if I can connect the decision back to my values or what's truly important to me (like, what will make my family happiest, or what will make my life simpler), it helps clarify things. It's like, okay, I'm picking this bc it aligns with *this* goal, not just bc it's the 'best' option out there.

It's a Journey, Not a Destination

Ngl, I still have moments where I'm standing there, totally blank, wondering how I'm ever going to pick a freakin' filter for an Instagram post, let alone something actually important. Hahah. But I'm giving myself grace. I'm learning that it's okay to be a freezer sometimes, as long as I'm also learning how to unfreeze. It's about progress, not perfection. And honestly, it's kinda empowering to feel like I'm taking back control of my own brain, even if it's just one small decision at a time. Life is too short to be stuck in indecision, right? I want to be present, to enjoy my girls, to make memories, not to spend all my time agonizing over what to wear or what to eat. So, if you're a freezer like me, just know you're not alone. And we can do this, one little unfreezing step at a time. What are your tips for making decisions? I'd love to hear them!! ❤