When Life Gets Messy (Literally) & How We Still Find Our Happy ✨

Okay so you guys know how sometimes life just throws you a curveball, or like, a whole entire pitcher? hahah. Well, that's kinda been us lately, and ngl, it's been a lot. You saw the pic, right? Yeah, sometimes it really do be like that. And honestly, I just had to share it bc I feel like we all go through these moments where you just look around and you're like, 'is this real life?' hahah. But through all the chaos and the literal messes, we're figuring out how to still find those little moments of joy and keep our sanity (mostly) intact.

I mean, let's be real, with three little girls, Stella, Ozzy, and baby Cherry, our house is basically a permanent construction zone mixed with a glitter factory and a snack graveyard. And I wouldn't trade it for the world, but also, sometimes I just wanna sit in a quiet room with a hot cup of coffee that stays hot for more than 30 seconds, you know? :,)

The Beautiful Chaos of Our Everyday

So the other day, when I took that picture, it was just one of those days. You know the kind. Stella had decided her new art project involved finger painting with yogurt on the kitchen floor, Ozzy was attempting to climb the bookshelf like it was Mount Everest, and Cherry, bless her heart, had just had a massive blowout that somehow managed to get on my hair. My hair, you guys! I couldn't even. Tanner was trying to fix something in the garage and I swear I heard a string of words that are definitely not approved for little ears. hahah. And I just stood there, in the middle of it all, and for a second I felt that familiar overwhelm creep in. Like, 'how am I supposed to do all the things and be all the things when everything is literally falling apart around me?'

But then, I looked at Stella's yogurt masterpiece, and she looked up at me with those big, innocent eyes, covered in white, and she just giggled. And then Ozzy, who had successfully scaled the first shelf, yelled 'Mama, I'm a monkey!' And Cherry, despite the unfortunate situation, was still smiling up at me from her changing pad. And in that moment, it just hit me. This is it. This is the messy, beautiful, chaotic life we built. And it's perfect, even when it's not. It's not always Instagram-perfect, and ngl, my feed probably makes it look a lot more put-together than it actually is sometimes. But the real, raw moments? Those are the ones I cherish the most.

Finding Our Reset Button (and Tanner's Role in It)

Tanner, my sweet husband, he's my rock through all of this. He saw me standing there, probably looking like I was about to spontaneously combust, and he just came over, gave me a hug, and said, 'Let's tackle this together, babe. What do you need?' And honestly, sometimes that's all it takes. Just someone to see you, to acknowledge that it's a lot, and to offer to help. He's always been my biggest hype man, my partner in crime, and my co-pilot in this crazy adventure called parenthood. I really don't know what I'd do without him. ily @tbeesto 😘

For me, my 'reset button' looks different every day. Sometimes it's a quick 10-minute hot shower where I can just stand under the water and pretend I'm on a tropical island. Other times, it's putting on my favorite comfy clothes (you know the ones, they're basically pajamas but socially acceptable) and just snuggling on the couch with the girls for a movie. And sometimes, it's just stepping outside for a few minutes, taking a deep breath of that fresh Utah air, and reminding myself that the sun will still rise tomorrow, even if today felt like a hurricane.

We've also found that having little routines, even when everything else feels out of control, really helps. Like, our morning routine with breakfast and getting everyone dressed, or our bedtime routine with stories and snuggles. They're like little anchors in our day that keep us grounded. It's not always perfect, trust me, there are plenty of mornings where we're running around like headless chickens, but having that general structure helps so much.

Permission to Be Imperfect

I feel like as moms, and just as people in general, we put so much pressure on ourselves to have it all together. To have the perfect house, the perfect kids, the perfect life. And I'm here to tell you, from one messy mom to another, it's okay if it's not perfect. It's okay if your house is a disaster zone sometimes. It's okay if you eat cereal for dinner bc you just can't bring yourself to cook one more thing. It's okay if you need a minute (or an hour, or a day) to yourself.

I used to beat myself up over every little thing. If the laundry wasn't done, if the dishes were piled high, if I hadn't posted on social media in a few days. But I'm learning to give myself grace. To remember that I'm doing my best, and my best is enough. And my kids? They don't care if the floor is sparkling clean. They care that I'm present, that I'm loving them, and that I'm there for them. That's what really matters.

One thing that's helped me a ton is just letting go of the expectation that everything has to be 'just so'. Like, the other day, we were supposed to have a perfectly planned outing, and it just went sideways. Instead of getting stressed, we pivoted. We ended up just staying home, building a fort in the living room, and having a picnic lunch inside. And you know what? It was one of the best days we've had in a while. Sometimes the unplanned, imperfect moments are the most magical.

Leaning on My Village (and My Mom!)

You guys know how much I talk about my mom. She's seriously my hero. She raised me as a single mom, and she did it with so much grace and strength. Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I just think of her, and it reminds me that I can do this too. She always tells me, 'Lo, it's just a phase. They grow up so fast. Soak it all in, even the hard parts.' And she's so right. She's always there to listen, to offer advice (only when I ask, hahah), and to just remind me that I'm not alone.

And it's not just my mom. It's my sisters, my friends, my whole little village. Having people you can call when you're feeling like you're drowning, or even just to vent about something silly, is so important. Don't be afraid to ask for help, whether it's from family, friends, or even just hiring someone to help with cleaning or childcare if you can. It's not a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength, bc you're prioritizing your well-being and your family's well-being.

Little Things That Make a Big Difference

Okay, so I wanted to share a few little things that have genuinely helped us navigate the messy moments. These aren't like, groundbreaking secrets, but they're things that make our everyday a little bit easier or brighter.

• Quick clean-up bursts: Instead of waiting for everything to be a disaster, we try to do 10-15 minute 'power cleans' a few times a day. Like, before dinner, everyone helps put away toys. Before bed, we do a quick sweep of the living room. It makes a huge difference in preventing overwhelming messes.
• Snack station: This is a lifesaver, you guys. We have a designated drawer in the fridge and a basket in the pantry with kid-friendly snacks that Stella and Ozzy can grab themselves (within reason, hahah). It cuts down on the 'I'm hungry!' demands and gives them a little independence.
• Outdoor time: Even if it's just 20 minutes in the backyard, getting outside does wonders for everyone's mood. Fresh air, sunshine, and a chance to run off some energy. It's a game-changer for meltdowns, both theirs and mine!
• Our favorite sound machine: For Cherry's naps and bedtime, this sound machine is literally magic. It creates such a peaceful environment and helps her (and us!) sleep so much better. It's linked in my bio if you're looking for one!
• Family dance parties: When the energy is low or everyone's feeling grumpy, we just blast some music and have a dance party. It's impossible to be in a bad mood when you're all just being silly and dancing together.
• Meal prepping simple things: I'm not a huge meal prepper, but I do try to chop veggies or make a big batch of something like pasta salad or hard-boiled eggs on Sunday. It makes throwing together quick meals during the week so much easier when things get crazy.

These are just a few things that work for us, and I feel like it's all about finding what works for you and your family. There's no one-size-fits-all answer, and that's the beauty of it. We're all just figuring it out as we go, right?

Embrace the Journey

So, yeah, sometimes it be like that. Sometimes your house looks like a tornado went through it, your hair is a mess, and you're pretty sure you're wearing two different socks. But those are also the moments that become the funniest stories later. Those are the moments that remind you that life isn't about perfection, it's about connection, love, and laughter. It's about building a family and making memories, even if those memories involve a lot of cleaning up. hahah.

I'm so grateful for this life, for my amazing husband, and for my three incredible girls. They challenge me, they push me, and they fill my heart with more love than I ever thought possible. And even on the messiest, craziest days, I wouldn't trade it for anything. So here's to embracing the chaos, finding the joy in the everyday, and giving ourselves a little grace along the way. You got this, mamas. We all got this. ❤